A few things...that make me want to say POES out loud, and usually do.(I know its not a nice word, nor ladylike, but when you're pissed off and need to rant, there's nothing better than the good old Ma Se !
1. The Wire-flower Seller
This cunning man has managed to con me out of countless cigarettes. Not once, not twice, but three times, has he stuffed a wonky-looking bright pink beaded flower through the tiny opening in my window and gone:
"Free!Mahala!", despite my insistence that I have no money, which is true, incidentally.
The millisecond the thing lands on my lap he goes "Ag missus, please, some change for food, I'm hungry"
DUDE.I'm also hungry.Why do you think I'm smoking? When I finally convince him that I am indeed broke, he sneakily changes his tactics.
"A smoke for me madam"
I dutifully hand him my second last Marlboro.
"And also for my friend"
I give him the box
"And a light"
There go my matches.
"And the flower, you didn't give me change"
The light has by now changed to green and I'm so pissed off I throw the thing out of the window.
"Thanks madam"
POES man. I'm too nice.
2.The Bell-ringing Bergie.
Once upon a time, my brother, the do-gooder in our family, gave this dude R50. I'm not sure what words were exchanged, but I'm pretty sure he didn't invite him back for weekly visits. Anyway, this fellow has now taken it up upon himself to press the intercom in ten-second intervals for five-minutes at a time. When no one answers, he starts gesticulating wildly at the camera, in what I imagine can only be a kind of bergie sign language, (although I did recognise a few universally acknowledged "fuck yous") When that fails to elicit any kind of response, he unzips his trousers and wees on the bushes. It would be highly entertaining to watch, were it not for the insistent bell ringing.
3.Not knowing whether to Stay or Go.
Added to this is my irritation with people who say "Well, what does your gut say?" I have been known to spend an hour in Clicks wondering whether to get the Moisture Injection or Daily Style Toni & Guy Shampoo. (I chose the Moisture Injection, tried it out, took it back and got the Daily Style.)
The thing is ,I HAVE NO IDEA. If I knew, I wouldn't be in such inner turmoil now would I?
Poes man.
1 comment:
POES man...i would definately have stayed with the moisture injection shampoo, just coz it sounds like a meat injection...for your hair.
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